The married lesbians

This phenomenon has been known for centuries-a lesbian married to a man and living in a presumably heterosexual family. There are plenty of reasons for that… Many reasons… but the end of such marriages is only one, everyone is hurt and disappointed. So, why does it happen that way? Mainly in two ways or let me call it because of two reasons.

First, many women do not realize that they are homosexual at the beginning, the lesbian feelings awake very late, when they are married, have kids, a car and a dog, and so on. But how is it possible they did not realize that they were lesbians? Very easily, in my opinion. Every film, every talk show and advertisement, everything emphasizes that as women they are obliged to like and want men. Every person in their family tells them that one day they will grow up and meet this SPECIAL man with whom they will connect their lifes. All of their teachers convince them that their future involves a man. And if they are not convinced in that deep inside, if they don`t have feelings for and avoid relationships with men, everyone convinces them that they are just one of these women who will create a relationship a little later than the others. Did you get it??? You are Jane and you should want Tarsan! And that`s it. So at the moment when Jane meets Tarsan, she feels relief for having responded to the expectations of everyone around her. And then, she suddenly realizes that instead of Tarsan, she prefers his sister! Uuupsie…

Second, many women realize that they are lesbians, but they feel ashamed, worry, and hope that they will change and become heterosexual if they marry to a guy. The reason for these feelings can be the homophobia inside or a reaction to the negative attitudes toward homosexuality in the family, the environment, and in general, everything around the woman. The exact reason is not important in the case, it is important that the change toward heterosexuality does not come. And when the change does not come, the desire for a woman becomes even stronger and insurmountable to such an extent that it cannot be ignored. The illusion is over and the relationship with the man changes so that it cannot continue as a ‘normal’ and ‘natural’ heterosexual marriage. Then, lots of things can happen and there are several scenarios, but this is not important…. The important, in this case, is that there is an explosion in the heart and soul of our ‘Jane’. She begins to hate ‘Tarsan’ and the end of the relationship is very painful for everyone involved in this big lie.

I don`t pretend that only these two reasons drive lesbians toward heterosexual marriages, but in my opinion, they are the predominant. The reasons can be several… the important is that there is only one end… so before undertaking the important step of marrying, each one of us has to think very carefully what awaits her, how she would manage with it… and stop before having made the fatal step.