Attraction to a woman in a later stage of life

Very often, I receive emails with the question how one can tell whether a woman is a lesbian. And most often, the question is posed by middle aged women who just start asking themselves about their sexual orientation. They are often scared or confused. And often, they have had no idea for years that such feelings could exist in them and that they could be lesbians. Until the feeling just slaps them in the face. Or the heart! As it happens most often…
Let us call her Maria…
As a rule Maria starts with a short description of her life. She is married and has one or two kids… a dog or a cat… a professional carrier… Rarely… very rarely is Maria only a housewife. Maria is almost always a woman who is committed to community or business carrier which keeps her away from the house and the kitchen. And at her job place, Maria meets HER, the colleague, the person who shares her views… first, Maria realizes that she admires this woman a lot. Her abilities are impressive and Maria starts working even harder so that she could, on her turn, impress HER, and she directs her attention to activities in which she could be closer to HER and HER activities. Soon, Maria starts thinking about them both as a team of co- thinkers. The family and friends of Maria constantly listen to praises of HER abilities, HER knowledge, achievements, and they even start worrying about Maria. They- friends and family – cannot explain their constant bitter remarks on hearing about HER, but it is fact that they are sick of listening to Maria`s praising. This is the first stage.
The second phase begins when Maria starts paying attention on HER looks, she admires HER figure, posture, dressing style… She pays attention on HER spirit, her grace, her nice looks… Soon, Maria starts changing her style or just duplicates the style of the woman she admires. And when SHE notices the changes, Maria feels flattered and encouraged to continue in the same direction. Maria`s friends and family also notice the change and continue making bitter remarks, again unknowing why…
The third stage begins when Maria suddenly realizes that she thinks about this woman all the time. Maria can find out that she thinks about HER eyes or hair… her breast or legs…. Maria can realize that she fantasizes sexually about this woman. Depending on how aware Maria is of her feelings and identity, she would slowly realize that she has a crush on HER. It is possible that Maria does not realize her sexual and intimate feelings immediately, but she will act the typical way of a person… in love with another person. A woman in love. Now, we reach the final stage in which Maria cannot hide the truth from herself, and she will realize that she is sexually attracted by HER. She will finally accept the thought that she wants to touch and caress this woman, hug and kiss HER, have sex with HER. At this moment, Maria` friends and family will realize that she has stopped talking about HER, and they will feel relief. And at this moment, Maria will begin the difficult journey toward getting to know her heart and mind. Getting to know her identity.

And so… before you decide to write me a letter in which you want to ask me whether I think you are a lesbian (but really… how am I supposed to know that?) think if the written above does not sound familiar to you. And if it does, don`t hurry up to state that you have changed your sexual orientation. Take your time. Wait for a while to see what kind of feelings you will have in the future. Prepare yourself psychologically for all possibilities and wait to see what happens.