Am I normal if I`m a lesbian


	Am I normal if I`m a lesbian?
back main page to be a lesbian

...shameful, and unnatural. But those who made such statements were also the ones telling that the woman's place was in the kitchen, that Gypsies, and Jews were inferior or just represented a background for the majority group. That the poor, old, and handicapped were useless. Who determines what is normal? Some people eat dogs, raw fish, and cockroaches and consider them entirely normal food products. Others think that such food habits are disgusting and unnatural...
...I think that you need courage to identify yourself as a lesbian and accept all consequences stemming from this decision....

Yes!! You are normal! The homosexual orientation does not predominate among people, but this fact does not make it unnatural. If we were to follow such logic, we could state that left- handed people are abnormal because most people write with their right hand. Or that the read-headed and those with negative rhesus factor are abnormal because most people are not read-headed and only 15% of the population has negative rhesus factor.. such ideas are ridiculous. It is absolutely natural for people to be emotionally and physically attracted to their own sex. This statement is valid for both, women and men. Homosexual relationships can look abnormal and unnatural to the heterosexual society, but not more unnatural than a heterosexual relationship will look for the lesbian. In any case, there is nothing unnatural in the desire of one human being to share her life and love with another person.
The argument that same sex couple is unnatural because the two partners can't create progeny is falsely grounded. The society readily and without scruples agrees to the cohabitation of heterosexual people who can't have children for one reason or another. But society does not admit this fact. People are either silently burdened with guilt or quick to stigmatize.

Many people repress their natural predilections namely because of prejudices towards gays and lesbians. Almost all sexologists argue that human sexuality solidifies during childhood, and some even state that sexuality is predetermined by birth. It is normal and healthy to be yourself, no matter what your sexual orientation is. It is really important to learn to like yourself as you are. This process is gradual, so don't get scared off when you discover your sexuality initially. The attraction to your own sex will contradict to whom you thought you'd be attracted. You might also get confused because of all the things you heard about the lesbians. But these stories are usually influenced by the stereotypes which heterosexuals hold. So the first thing to do upon discovering your sexuality, is to find an information about what it is to be a lesbian and toward what kind of adventure does this fact head you off. After you find reliable sources of information, one that lacks stereotypes, you`ll start a transition to another phase- getting used to the idea that you are a lesbian. This fact should not scare you off. Some women are heterosexual, others are lesbians like you and me. As some women have blue eyes, others brown- the eye colour is not a personal choice.

As every change in your life, you will need some time to get used to the thought that you are homosexual, to adjust to the fact that you are lesbian. For example if you wear glasses, remember how you needed some time to get used to them before feeling comfortable with glasses. Wearing glasses changed your outlook, you were worried what people would think of your new image, you felt them awkward on your nose...so that glasses have changed not only your vision but your perception of your own self. The same happens when you find out that you might be a lesbian. It will take a while to feel comfortable. To be a lesbian is just a part of your identity, and this fact does not change the whole of you in any way. Your sexuality has lived in you unconsciously, and realizing it, you don't become another person as a way of life, learning or work capacities. And your sexuality is of equal value to the rest of the people.

The human identity has many values and dimensions, and being a lesbian is just one of them. Whether people will accept lesbian love as something normal depends on their personal criteria of ''normality.'' From the lesbian view point, a heterosexual relationships might be unnatural, and they often feel disgusted by the thought of heterosexual sex. This fact does not lead them to protests that the heterosexual sex is unnatural for those who practice it. Usually, the heterosexual people are those who call the homosexual relationships ''abnormal.'' Homosexuality is spread in nature. Antelopes, wild boars, bulls, cows, chimpanzees, gorilla, ducks, dogs, cats, horses, rams, sheep, and many other have homosexual spices among them. And by the way, there is no observable discrimination or violence against these animals. I would rather say- half jokingly, half seriously- homosexuality draws us close to nature.

Many heterosexual people quote specialists- psychiatrists, psychologists, and sexologists who continue to claim that homosexuality is a psychological disorder. You can truly find a description of homosexuality as a psychological disorder in some old textbooks. But in 1973, the American Psychiatric Association voted to remove homosexuality from its official list of psychological disorders and declared that ''homosexuality does not impact common sense, psychological balance, reliability, and the social and professional skills of a person.''
      The firm decision of the American Psychiatric Association is the following:
''The American Psychiatric Association does not tolerate any kind of public or personal acts of discrimination against homosexuality in the occupational fields and professional skills, cohabitation, public places, and vocational courses. The American Psychiatric Association declares that there is no scientific evidence which excuse discriminatory attitude toward homosexuality and calls upon formulation of legal mechanisms of protection which have been granted to other groups threatened by discrimination on the basis of sex, race, skin colour, religious belief, etc.''
      In 1974, the American Medical Association and the American Law Association agreed with this statement and supported the following proposal of the American Institute of Legislation:
''The consensual relationship between adult people from the same sex has to be removed from the list of offences and consecutively become legal.''
      During 1975, the American Psychological Association also gives its consent to the declaration of the American Psychiatric Association, the American Medical Association, and the American Law Association, and urges all medical personnel to promote a correct image of homosexuality, which has been considered a disease for a long time. One rhetorical question comes to mind: Why these medical conclusions are ignored or discarded by the Church or the politicians, from the society and its institutions, as well as from the heterosexual people!?